Welcome to the SABERTOOTH SISTERHOOD

Sabertooth:  when you’ve evolved past, and out grown the  

cougar stage and boy-toys. 

Ladies! Okay I get it. The whole red and purple thing; being old and laughing at forgetfulness, weak bladders and muffin tops. Yeah, I get it, but I won’t accept it. When I see a bunch of cackling women, dressed like that, I just feel sad. I see no confidence, pride or zest for life. I just see a bunch of women with a ‘look at me’ attitude, trying very hard to ‘look happy’.

Unlike Ivana who was quoted as saying she’d never look older than 29 as long as a plastic surgeon draw breath. She looks very good, FOR HER AGE, but let’s face it, no one would ever accuse her of being 29. Same goes [went] for Mae West. She too lived under that same illusion.

Looking our very best for whatever age we are, is all you can hope for and/or achieve. So what the hell is my point? We women have to hang together and do not allow ourselves to be marginalized any longer. Oh, you think you’re not?

Let’s run a couple of scenarios and see…..

Has anyone ever said to you: “Well at least you’re still ‘young at heart’” or any other such asinine platitude?

When you go to a new hairdresser, has the stylist every asked you: “Do you just let your hair dry naturally?” They would NEVER ask that of a women in her thirties.

How about: “Do you have access to a computer?” Like it is so far above anyone over the age of 29 that we couldn’t possibly understand such freakin' magic.

The answer is ‘Hell yes, my home is networked and I even have a computer in my kitchen with a couple of thousand of recipes.

The worst is when we do it to each other. Case in point; I went into a national beauty supply store [wearing only clear lip gloss] and started looking at lipsticks [it’s a passion of mine]. A woman about my age came up and said “May I suggest you pick a light orange and a light pink. I carry both in my purse all the time, so I’m always prepared”. I know she was [probably] trying to be helpful, but her slightly condescending smirk that got me.

So… I replied “Oh, is that what these magical things are called. How did you pronounced that again?” She looked confused. “I’ll manage by myself, thanks.” And I swear I said it with a  soft smile.

 

At some point; I don’t know when, we ‘older’ women relinquished our rightful places to the younger ones who sadly revere Paris Hilton, and the whole Jersey crew, and class turned to trash. For some unknown reason, we stopped making eye contact, and quietly went about our business. Who is responsible for this? I believe it’s the fault of the heartland of America. Nebraska to be specific. It seems that once a woman marries, she dons a house-dress, wash-n-wear perms and an obligatory front porch rocking chair. I’m serious; I’ve been to Omaha and it scared the hell out of me.

Well, it all changes today, but I can’t do this myself. We are the woman of Rock and Roll, the 1960’s [give or take a decade]; the women every other generation wishes they were.

They don’t make ‘em like us anymore. Say it, believe it; pass it on.

When you see a Saber Tooth, smile and nod as if we are privy to that all knowing secret: we will not go gently or quietly into the night!

In this column, we’ll discover how to be our very best any age. Not just looks, but health, stamina and yes, even orgasms. We will pool our knowledge and grow from the experience.

I promise we won’t wear hats… but we will make our statement. We are today, forming the SABERTOOTH SISTERHOOD!

Peace and Love, my sisters!